holy fuck. what a day.
magic mountain was fucking awesome. not five minutes into the trip, nico found forty bucks just lying in the bushes outside chris's house, which we promptly made him use to buy us breakfast. the drive down was relatively uneventful, except that SOMEHOW the topic of using public toilets came up, and chris said he put like five layers of seat covers on before sitting down, because "who knows what kind of festering ass sores the last person had." i called the guy that was supposed to meet us (who turned out to be sick) as soon as we got past the ticket booths, and as usual we were accosted by the pervasive soul thiefs (picture takers for you uncultured swine out there). not feeling like dealing with them, i turned them away with a simple "NOOOOOO!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" which hopefully was recorded on the guy's voicemail. in line for the metal detectors these girls yelled at me asking if we went to cal poly. i have no idea how they knew, but they were right, and it turned out they did too. so maybe they recognized one of us. once through the gate we headed straight for X, which to our chagrin was closed, but this situation was later to be rectified. we then headed over to viper, which was also closed. confused, we walked in the direction of the other rides, ending up at deja vu, the only ride i haven't been on...which was closed. then we sorrowfully ambled over to psyclone, which by some miracle was open. the oldest, most rickety fucking wooden piece of shit rollercoaster was in perfect working order, but every other ride we'd tried so far was closed. i suppose it was a good first ride though, since it is toward the lower end of the spectrum as far as magic mountain rides go. it beats the shit out of rides like the ninja and goldrusher though. so after that we headed back over to deja vu, which was now open...only to discover nico was TOO TALL to ride. not too discouraged, we headed over in the direction of riddler's revenge, which was fun, and batman, which was also fun...until we got off and started playfully punching each other in the arm. chris said, "now settle down ladies..." which drew a comment from some mother who was also getting off the ride: "yeah, i have a child here," and chris said, "why does that concern me?" so we were walking down the exit ramp, and we heard the woman say to her daughter, "...he's just a jerk." chris said, "oh, i'm a jerk! thanks!" and the mother said, "you're welcome." with not less than a healthy helping of sarcasm i might add. so we thought the ordeal was over, until her huge husband came up to us and nearly shouted, "you got a problem with your mouth around my daughter!?" the wife ran up behind him and pointed her finger at chris and said, "he's the one with the big mouth!" or something to that effect. now, chris did not utter one bad word during the whole interchange, and he stated this: "hey, i never said anything." to which the woman replied, "well we heard you in line before the ride!" people were starting to try to push past, so the husband said something like, "next time my wife tells you to respect our kid you do it!" and walked away while we chuckled to ourselves. of course all the great comebacks and responses came to us after the fact. so then we went on scream, which was awesome, and as we were walking out the exit the greatest thing happened. these girls walked up to us and asked if we wanted to ride again, and said they were from kodak. apparently they needed four guys for pictures to put up in the photo booths. so after signing some waivers, we went straight to the front of the lines for scream, goliath, jetstream, viper, and X (see, i told you we'd get our X). the cameras for X were down but they let us go to the front anyway, which was awesome. on the first two rides i took the dorkiest and most retarded pictures ever, and chris's were pretty bad too. on goliath, at the very moment the camera took the shot, the wind whipped my head back and i had absolutely no control over my facial expression. the picture was so bad they couldn't use it, and gave it to us. but it was really fun, and even though i'm a dork it would be cool to see our picture up in one of those booths. i was the only one who had been on X before, and the others loved it. that is definitely the best ride in the universe. then nathan got food while the rest of us went and got gourmet ice...the lime was awesome. endless shit was talked the whole day, mostly by chris and mostly about me, but i didn't mind. it was good for many a hysterical laugh. after we left the girls we went on colossus, sans nico who felt he'd hit his daily quota of rides, and then they convinced me to leave, even though i got that feeling you get when you pay for a buffet and don't eat until you're full. it was ok though, because we hit all the good rides and only waited in line for four of them. after leaving i went WAY past the 126 and had to flip a bitch and go back. in ventura we hit up in n out, me and nico getting the compulsory 5x5's and fries (animal style of course) and shakes. my burger had a respectable amount of cheese, but nowhere near ideal. but it was SO good, since this was around five and it was the first time i'd eaten since breakfast around eight. afterward i took a good healthy shit, and i was influenced by chris's festering ass sores comment to use a seat cover. then we headed the rest of the way home, where the scathing commentary continued. we laughed so much. then we chilled at xandie's for a bit, and went to baskin robbins before heading home. all in all an extremely fun day, and all thanks to cesar chavez.
and in conclusion, ass gasket.
song of the post: soggy bottom boys - man of constant sorrow
magic mountain was fucking awesome. not five minutes into the trip, nico found forty bucks just lying in the bushes outside chris's house, which we promptly made him use to buy us breakfast. the drive down was relatively uneventful, except that SOMEHOW the topic of using public toilets came up, and chris said he put like five layers of seat covers on before sitting down, because "who knows what kind of festering ass sores the last person had." i called the guy that was supposed to meet us (who turned out to be sick) as soon as we got past the ticket booths, and as usual we were accosted by the pervasive soul thiefs (picture takers for you uncultured swine out there). not feeling like dealing with them, i turned them away with a simple "NOOOOOO!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" which hopefully was recorded on the guy's voicemail. in line for the metal detectors these girls yelled at me asking if we went to cal poly. i have no idea how they knew, but they were right, and it turned out they did too. so maybe they recognized one of us. once through the gate we headed straight for X, which to our chagrin was closed, but this situation was later to be rectified. we then headed over to viper, which was also closed. confused, we walked in the direction of the other rides, ending up at deja vu, the only ride i haven't been on...which was closed. then we sorrowfully ambled over to psyclone, which by some miracle was open. the oldest, most rickety fucking wooden piece of shit rollercoaster was in perfect working order, but every other ride we'd tried so far was closed. i suppose it was a good first ride though, since it is toward the lower end of the spectrum as far as magic mountain rides go. it beats the shit out of rides like the ninja and goldrusher though. so after that we headed back over to deja vu, which was now open...only to discover nico was TOO TALL to ride. not too discouraged, we headed over in the direction of riddler's revenge, which was fun, and batman, which was also fun...until we got off and started playfully punching each other in the arm. chris said, "now settle down ladies..." which drew a comment from some mother who was also getting off the ride: "yeah, i have a child here," and chris said, "why does that concern me?" so we were walking down the exit ramp, and we heard the woman say to her daughter, "...he's just a jerk." chris said, "oh, i'm a jerk! thanks!" and the mother said, "you're welcome." with not less than a healthy helping of sarcasm i might add. so we thought the ordeal was over, until her huge husband came up to us and nearly shouted, "you got a problem with your mouth around my daughter!?" the wife ran up behind him and pointed her finger at chris and said, "he's the one with the big mouth!" or something to that effect. now, chris did not utter one bad word during the whole interchange, and he stated this: "hey, i never said anything." to which the woman replied, "well we heard you in line before the ride!" people were starting to try to push past, so the husband said something like, "next time my wife tells you to respect our kid you do it!" and walked away while we chuckled to ourselves. of course all the great comebacks and responses came to us after the fact. so then we went on scream, which was awesome, and as we were walking out the exit the greatest thing happened. these girls walked up to us and asked if we wanted to ride again, and said they were from kodak. apparently they needed four guys for pictures to put up in the photo booths. so after signing some waivers, we went straight to the front of the lines for scream, goliath, jetstream, viper, and X (see, i told you we'd get our X). the cameras for X were down but they let us go to the front anyway, which was awesome. on the first two rides i took the dorkiest and most retarded pictures ever, and chris's were pretty bad too. on goliath, at the very moment the camera took the shot, the wind whipped my head back and i had absolutely no control over my facial expression. the picture was so bad they couldn't use it, and gave it to us. but it was really fun, and even though i'm a dork it would be cool to see our picture up in one of those booths. i was the only one who had been on X before, and the others loved it. that is definitely the best ride in the universe. then nathan got food while the rest of us went and got gourmet ice...the lime was awesome. endless shit was talked the whole day, mostly by chris and mostly about me, but i didn't mind. it was good for many a hysterical laugh. after we left the girls we went on colossus, sans nico who felt he'd hit his daily quota of rides, and then they convinced me to leave, even though i got that feeling you get when you pay for a buffet and don't eat until you're full. it was ok though, because we hit all the good rides and only waited in line for four of them. after leaving i went WAY past the 126 and had to flip a bitch and go back. in ventura we hit up in n out, me and nico getting the compulsory 5x5's and fries (animal style of course) and shakes. my burger had a respectable amount of cheese, but nowhere near ideal. but it was SO good, since this was around five and it was the first time i'd eaten since breakfast around eight. afterward i took a good healthy shit, and i was influenced by chris's festering ass sores comment to use a seat cover. then we headed the rest of the way home, where the scathing commentary continued. we laughed so much. then we chilled at xandie's for a bit, and went to baskin robbins before heading home. all in all an extremely fun day, and all thanks to cesar chavez.
and in conclusion, ass gasket.
song of the post: soggy bottom boys - man of constant sorrow
